Farewell 1 - Friends

Yesterday was my last day of work at the old office. It had been an emotional trip for me. I had been with the company five years ago when it was still relatively small and with some of the older staff had worked with the company until it is now what it is, a bigger organisation with more than one hundred percent increase in revenue and labour force.

A close colleague who was also one of my daily lunch partners had been as distraught and emotional as me at my leaving. We were there struggling with the company together and she felt sad that those who have helped the company so much were not rewarded for being loyal but were instead unappreciated.

She is not one to write beautiful words but she got me a lovely gift and card in which she wrote her touching farewell:

"The feeling of bitter, upset disappointment and mix feeling over your departure from xxx. On the other hand, feeling sweet happy when you accept the new job. New phase of life to meet up with more people and have better opportunity in future.

A small gift for you hoping you to have more time to enjoy candle light dinners wih love ones.

Wishing you all the best. Be happy and most of all good health.

Your bitter sweet friend"

She had coaxed me to accept my new job when I was hesitant. She did not want me to leave a good job without getting another one. We were close enough for her to know my personal life situation, how I had struggled to take care of my mother while still holding onto the tough job and how because of things happening in my life that had taken much of my time, I am still without a partner. She also knows of the then present political situation I was in and the sufferings I had gone through. She wants me very much to find someone to be happy with and to share my emotions.

She knew that I used to have a boyfriend from another town and although I never told her that we had broken up, she must have guessed and we both know that I am now single.

Good colleagues are like family. We have met each other everyday since the year 2002 and now we won't be meeting each other everyday anymore. We console each other that I will be working not too far away, that we will meet often and that I will come over for lunch when I can.

This is like experiencing the grief of loss. I have similar feelings about not going to the office. The emotions I felt this morning about yesterday being my last day of work at the office and never going there to check in for work anymore in future, seems so unreal. I felt so sad at the loss but loss of what? It's difficult to define but I think I do know what. Not just friends and despite the actions (or non actions) of certain people, I had enjoyed my work and was proud of it. My friend and I knew (and felt) that my career was cut short by these people when it should have ended with a retirement at this xxx. But we also both know that it's not a struggle worth fighting for.

I'll commemorate my other colleagues' farewells to me in later posts.